To the employers that have turned me down

Dear sir/madam employer,

THANK YOU!

Thank you so much for not hiring me, for not counting on my services in your company’s projects. Thank you for not believing in my talent, thank you for your biases and thank you for your fears and insecurities about hiring a young mother. I really can’t say “thank you” enough!

True, the moment you declined my recruitment, I felt discouraged and even started to doubt myself. It is true too, that I felt crushed when I asked for an explanation and you did not give me any feedback that I could use for future job applications.

Undeniably, I spent many a day wondering what turned hiring teams away from me. I remember asking people for their assessment and among the dozens I received, I would like to highlight a couple:

On one hand, the most helpful of all clearly said, “It’s very tough for a young woman your age, and a mother at that, to find a strong foothold, professionally speaking. They just wouldn’t hire fertile females at the height of a possible reproduction stage!”

On the other, the most bizarre of them all was from one of the interviewers (perhaps it was you!), saying, “The roster of candidates presented really high profiles”. I must’ve sounded pathetic when I asked for further explanation. Was it that I was competing with people bearing PhDs? Or perhaps they had done super-cool internships or have worked in uber-fantastic companies beforehand? Because as you know from the CV I sent you, my background is not bad at all. In short, the person I was talking to simply rephrased the same sentence. And it was months after I realized that “profile” not only refers to one’s recent professional history- it also relates to one’s educational and why not, social background.

I only mention them for the purpose of expressing my amazement. But I suppose none of this surprises you…

Please allow me to get back to the original thought and main content of this letter: gratitude. I would like to show my long-overdue appreciation for not hiring me because had you trusted in my capabilities, had you given me a chance to collaborate with you, I would not be where I am now. May I also add that I am utterly blooming right where I am now? I deliberately used the term “blooming” because of the future promise it paints in the reader’s mind. This is the very reason I am being very grateful for the turn of my life’s events.

For the first time as an employee, I truly feel the opportunity to learn, grow, contribute and be an active part of a team. For the first time, I am under a leadership which sets an exquisite example of excellence and humanity. Likewise, I belong to a group of strong, intelligent and kind people where my voice is heard and my flaws, courteously mended. This healthy balance, and the chance to grow in this newfound career are worth all the wait. I wake up each day, inspired and eager to go to work, knowing that I am productive. I look at myself in the mirror and feel good, knowing that I’m doing my part to elicit positive changes in people’s lives.

Had you given me the chance to work with you, I would not be living this dream. So sir/madam, thank you very much for turning me down. I wish you the best of luck in your endeavors and I also wish for you the same professional happiness and fulfillment that I feel at present.

thank-you-gratitude

Sincerely yours,

KR